Larry B Gray

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Real Estate Agent - Real Estate Consultant - SL3199919

ARCHIVED BLOG POSTS

2016 

  Q: What do you get when you mix holy water with milk of magnesia A: A Religious movement * A Columbia Doctor's secretary called an old farmer out my way and said: "Your check came back." The old man replied, "So did my arthritis."*Morty was in his usual place in the morning sitting at the table...
01/10/2016
  A cowboy walks into a bar in Texas, orders three mugs of Bud and sits in the back room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it, it wo...
01/09/2016
  The latest proposal to drive the ISIS out of Syria is to send in the ASF (Alabama Special Forces.) Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, Cooter and Junior are being sent in with the following information about the Taliban: 1. The season opened last weekend. 2. There is no limit. 3. They taste just li...
01/08/2016
   Sorry, Wrong Address! It's wise to remember how easily this wonderful e-mail technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business ...
01/07/2016
 Charlie was a regular visitor at the racetrack. One afternoon he noticed an unusual sight. Right before the first race, a Catholic priest visited one of the horses in the stable area and gave it a blessing. Charlie watched the horse race very carefully, and sure enough the blessed horse came in ...
01/06/2016
   Montana Grizzly Bear Notice In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Montana Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the field. We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little b...
01/05/2016
(older statistics that have only gotten worse.)        Think about this:a. The number of physicians in the US is 700,000. b. Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year is 120,000. c. Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171. (US Dept. of HealthHuman Services)Then think about this:a. The numb...
01/04/2016
  Two guys from Detroit, Michigan die and wake up in hell. The next day, the devil stops to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and bomber hats, warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?" The two guys reply, "Well...
01/03/2016
  A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (th...
01/02/2016
  Little Johnny's father said, "let me see your report card."Johnny replied, "I don't have it.""Why not?" His father asked."My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."   **********************  One night, Little Johnny went to sleep and dreamt his Uncle Bill died. He woke up and t...
01/01/2016
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Larry Gray

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