Larry B Gray

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Real Estate Agent - Real Estate Consultant - SL3199919

ARCHIVED BLOG POSTS

2014 

Brother John entered the "Monastery of Silence" and the Abbott said, "Brother, this is a silent monastery; you are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so." Brother John lived in the monastery for five years before the Abbott said to him, "Brother John...
06/29/2014
  Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interv...
06/29/2014
  Q: How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster?A: Terrier-fied!Q: What do you get if you cross a gun dog with a telephone?A: A golden receiver!Q: What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?A: Dingo Starr!Q: What do you call a dog magician?A: A labracadabrador.Q:...
06/27/2014
  Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a b...
06/26/2014
  Q: What does a nosey pepper do?A: Gets jalapeno business!Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: An ImpastaQ: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An InvestigatorQ: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?A: Every morning you'll rise and shine!Q: "What's the difference between a gui...
06/26/2014
  By following the simple advice I heard on a Dr. Phil Show, I have finally found inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I started and hadn't finished; and, before leaving the house t...
06/24/2014
  During a business trip to China, I was browsing through a department store in Beijing when a staff member timidly approached me. "Excuse me," she said. "Are you American?" "Yes, I am," I answered. "What state are you from?" she asked. "Texas, " I replied proudly. "Oh, I'm sorry," she said, obv...
06/23/2014
  While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was approached by a little girl about six years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a policeman?" "Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask th...
06/22/2014
    A bar owner in the Old West has just hired a timid new bartender. The owner of the establishment is giving his new hire some instructions on running the place. He tells the timid man, "If you ever hear that Big John is coming to town, drop everything and run for the hills!! He's the meanest,...
06/21/2014
  A man was out for a walk and saw a funeral procession. But this one was strange. There was two hirsch... then a man and a dog walking behind them... then a very long line of people. Curious, he went up to the man and asked, "who died?" The man answered "my mother-in-law and my wife" So then th...
06/21/2014
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Larry Gray

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