Okay, If I read this right, you have not heard from her since June 2007?? What to do? Monica how can you trust her again? She had plenty of time to call and apologize or explain or whatever. If you want to help her, refer her to someone and warn them first.

Monika -- this is just awful.  I have had this happen once in 10+ years and it was not fun.  Someone relocating no less!  I had set up 3 days of showings -- I thought something happened to his plane so I went to 10 showings on my own the first day -- got permission to take photos so I could review them -- I never heard from this guy -- Unbelievable!  I guess I am lucky it only happened once, but once is enough.  You work way to hard for someone to be so disrespectful of you and your time.

Remember people rarely really surprise us and change. I bet you have better things to do in 2008 than sit in your car and wait again....

Such is the nature of internet leads Monika., often unpredictable. And yet, one never gives up hope right, especially in this real estate market. Sorry for the timewaster.

Monika - I would assume this would happen again since she never called to explain the failure to show last time.

Now, that's just rude!  Provided she wasn't in a car accident or something of equal horror, I would probably let her know how inconsiderate it was to stand someone up. 

Hi Monika - someone who has that little respect for me, for my time and efforts, doesn't get it again, especially with no explanation given for standing you up.  Unless there was something in the lead info you got that indicates she's a changed person, I'd be saying 'next'.

Ann

Monika it is so sad to hear stories like this. It is shameful when people show such a lack of disrespect for others.

what a frustrating experience that I am sure that most of us have been through once (or twice) in our career, it is hard to avoid this though, some people will act like that no matter how you prepare

Wow, I can't believe this woman was gutsy enough to contact you again! In the immortal words of David Knox, I say, "Let it go!" There are much better uses of your time than working with someone with no manners!

Sounds like SHE'S FIRED!!!

Sounds like more than 75% of my prospects in my database. Somebody just dont know a good thing when they see it. You are such a very good real estate professional Monika. Its their loss. Have a great weekend. Great post.

Monika, I've been there before.  It's not fun.  I don't think common courtesy is quite as common as it used to be.  Don't get me wrong... 99% of the folks I've worked with were wonderful.  It's the 1% that can get under your skin.

Monika:

Bye bye. Now the question is, do you respond so you are not viewed in the same way you view her, or do you ignore it. Or refer her on?

Jeff

Congratulations on the gold star!

Are you SURE it is the same person.  Not someone else with the same name?  If it were the same person I'd explain and politely decline working with her.

Hi Monika, I hate to say, but her track record indicates that there is a very good possibility that she will do the same thing all over again. I have a dear friend in the mortgage business, that agrees with me, that sometimes we have to remember that we want houses for them more than they want houses for themselves!  For me, I would move on!  Best wishes!

Karen... I don't think I can trust her at all. Funny thing is she is still looking after all this time.

Joan...I could not believe that she never responded to my calls.

Susan...Your right I do have better things to do!

Thanks Ronnie.

Jennifer..That is what I am worried about- that she will do it again.

Jesse...I want to send her a link to my post!

She's not worth your time! Walk away!

Ann...Next it is!

Thank you Bill. Your right!

James...I bet she doesn't really much care.

Kristen...I'm sure she has no idea or if she does she simply does not care.

Tom...She is fired!!! LOL

Lanre...Thank you so much :)

Kristina...she definitely got under my skin!

Jeff...I will respond. Even though I don't want to!

Thanks Jesse.

Tammy...She is the same person...home phone and cell phone numbers match up.

Thanks Sandy... I will move on!

Thank you everyone!

It's been my experience that if you have not communicated with buyers and they with you in the last 24 hrs then they ain't gonna show.

BUT it's kinda like if you lend someone $20 and you never see them again, it was worth it.

Sorry to hear about your experience. Its unfortunately happening more and more with the shaky housing and financial markets with lookers who may be on the borderline of qualifying.

Monika,  I suppose this will happen to each of us if we are in the business long enough.  It happened to me and I finally came to believe this guy just didn't get it .

Don't take it personal. Some people just don't get it. We are professionals and if we didn't act accordingly we would hear about it. The sad thing is we don't have an ethics committee to report potential clients to. Just dust the dirt off your feet and keep going. It doesn't make you a bad agent it just makes the customer a bad customer.

It's very frustrating.   I try to call the day before or that morning, but no guarantees.

Sorry, its happened to all of us.

Hey most people think we are just glorified taxi drivers anyway. Sad but true.

I would give her a call and remind her of your last encounter with her and see what she says.  It's better to get it out in the open.

Monika~ Thankfully it doesn't happen all that often.  I usually give my clients the benefit of the doubt too!  I have found that most people really are good!  Just move on to the "Next" person and don't let it get you down for long....

Monika:  You are not only a professional, but obviously a kind person.  She did not just cancel at the last minute, she stood you up.  You gave her they benefit of the doubt--tried to make her look good in front of the other broker--and she still did not even have the courtesy to contact you with an explanation, even after you spoke to one of her family members, so I am sure she realized what she had done.  Since you are a professional---your time and talents are very valuable--so preserve them for thost clients who are serious about working with you and will respect and value your time and expertise.  In most cases, we do not know who those clients are--so we enter into a business relationship hoping for the best.  In this case, you have the benefit of experience so you can make an informed choice.  I will leave you with my favorite definition of insanity:  "Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results". 

Monika, that is frustrating to be stood up for you, but how aggravating to make all of those appointments and they get stood up too?  You would think with all of the of the communication technology we have today, it couldn't be that she could get in touch with you.  I think it is a case of being rude and disrespectful, period.

She seems to have some nerve if she never apologized or even at least explained herself and just expects you to help her again.  I hate to say it because I like to give people the benefit of the doubt but it seems like she doesn't have much concern for your time or effort.

OH BOY...I've been there. I understand your wanting to help her, but what she did was pretty cold. What makes you think that she will respect you this time around? It may be different...but it may be just the same as before. ALL you asked her for was a call. That is the basic, basic show of respect. Still...I'd probably help her, too. That's just me. GBU!

Moni - We all get one now and again. I have this person calling me and making appointments only for him/her to cancel at the last minute or not at all 4 times. I dumped her today - told our webmaster to give her/him to someone with more time on their hands.

I seriously don't get it.  Perhaps she was too embarrassed to call you back.  What is she calling for now?

Monika.. this is very interesting... Some times they just seem to follow you around.

That's horrible!  You shouldn't take it personally though -- the potential buyer should be (any maybe is) embarrased by her behavior.  As for meeting with her again, I would have to say I would not give her a second chance unless she apologized.   If she was looking over a year ago, most likely she is just a tire-kicker anyway.  

Wow! Makes getting a retainer before working with a client sound rather attractive, no? Just imagine if we (real estate agents) valued our time and knowledge as much as doctors or lawyers or bankers? Or better yet, what if our clients valued our professional skills???? Okay Okay - just dreaming. <that's all said tongue-in-cheek; sort of>

Will you directly address your client's poor treatment of your time in the past if you talk to her? It isn't surprising that she's still looking, and I bet when she recognizes your name she won't have the courage to talk to you.

Ouch that sounds frustrating, but props for bouncing back from it:)

Is crazy that that stuff happens - is a lack of respect.  I would probably just refer the lead now for a referral fee or have a frank and candid discussion to see what the person wants to do.

Monika- I don't understand this either.  You have someone calling, e-mailing and texting to set up showing and appointments and then they disappear or worse...  I communicated back and forth with someone who found me on my website and wanted to look at some investment properties.  The night before- when I had already asked her to let me know for sure which properties she wanted to see so I could set them up...she sends an e-mail she set up with another realtor because I hadn't gotten back with her...what??? I was waiting on her- I was the last e-mail.  Needless to say, I wished her well and advised I was sorry for the mis-communication, but hello!!!  I wanted to scream " I have been e-mailing you almost everyday for 2 weeks- what the *****?  but, I took it in stride and will move on.   What is wrong with people- don't they realize we are working when searching, calling and setting up viewings?

Real estate 101.  A buyers agent of our was stood up today also.  Maybe they looked at their stock statements.

Monica, oh ouch!  I hate it when they're late, but standing up your Realtor is downright rude!

Been there, done that! It is frustrating, annoying, and it really makes you doubt everybody else. After years of putting up with things like this, you become a little cynical. Now I make sure to call my clients before the appointment to make sure they have not forgotten or changed their mind, but even that is no guarantee. Sorry to hear about your troubles! This too shall pass! And I'm sure another one will come along! :o)

Hi Monika,

I had that happen to me once too. 

What I learned from that experience was I had not had a buyer consultation with that person, nor had they been pre-approved prior to my scheduling of properties to show them.

I now have prospects jump through some hoops.  They don't get the use of my time until they show me that they are a motivated and pre-approved buyer, who wants to buy a home in the next 30 - 60 days.  If they aren't ready yet, that's OK.  But they will not waste my time.  I explain to them how I work and if they're in agreement, we go to the next step.  It may sound like it, but I'm not a hard - _ _ _ about it.  There's either mutual respect there or either of us can decide to walk away.  I tell prospects that I'm interviewing them as much as they're interviewing me.  Again, that's ok!

The days of being a taxi driver taking people around to listings endlessly and never helping them buy a home should be gone.  You need to set standards that you run your business by and people can either abide by them or you just say 'NEXT!"  You need to constantly qualify people during the process...sometimes directly and sometimes indirectly with subtle questions. 

Be in control of your time...your life...your destiny!

Hi Monika,

So sorry to hear about this, yet I think you were far more patient that I would have been.

The last time it happened to me was years ago. Ironically it was a past client. I actually drove to pick her up, the kids said "oh she's out at garage sales"...that was it, I was done. In our prior transaction everythig was last minute, we were always on hold.

 Later I called the husband and said "I don't think you value my time and you need to find someone else to work with." Done, NO regrets.

Rude.... but it does happen, that is the reality of our time. Please don't feel too bad, you are definitely not alone. It happens very, very often.  

Monika,so sorry that happened to you. I think I missed something...you said you knew her from before. Did she do this to you before or is this an isolated experience with her?

I have become more stringent in that I must have Lender Approval papers before I take anyone out and I lose some that don't want to go to the trouble to get that 1st step accomplished but the ones that do show up with their paperwork never leave me in the lurch...at least not so far.

She is plain and simply rude not to mention disrespectful.

Trust me if we stood up the buyers like this stood you up they would be on the phone

to our brokers in a heartbeat.  I say save yourself the anguish and tell her no thanks.

I would HOPE that even if you do call her, once she recognizes you are the Realtor that she stood up she will run the other direction anyway.  Move on!

Sounds like most think you should kick her to the curb or refer. 

At the very least, I would give her a call and remind her of our last communication, or lack thereof, then go from there.  A simple phone call wouldn't set me back too much!

Yikes, unbelievable.  I have a friend who once was previewing properties for a client and at one of those properties ran into that client...with another agent!  Cheers, Harley

Oh please get rid of her.  She is not worth the time.  I don't understand how people can be so inconsiderate.  I've had prospects stand me up and it's not a great feeling.

I have taken notice from my own actions and try not to string people along and let them know upfront whether or not I'm available because I know how it feels to be kept waiting.

MeLisa Minter, Realtor

www.homesmint2be.com

Monika - Maybe - make an appointment with her in your office.  If she shows, then schedule another appointment to look at property.

I would write her a nice email back and let her know that the relationship would not work.  Tell her that she wasted your time, the co-op agents time, and inconvenienced 4 sellers. 

Perhaps she'll get it then.

Monika, your knee jerk reaction was right on. "should I ever both with this?"

 When ever I get that feeling, I've learned to ask the person to meet me my office for an initial interview, to have a face to face meeting. I feel it really helps the client understand what we do is a business ( not just to open the door so they can see inside) we review all the homes on the market in their price range on MLS in front of the computer,(this makes them trust more) we make sure they have financing lined up and then schedule a follow up appointment to go view the homes. That way we don't waist time.

Hope you have a better weekend.

I see it all the time. I can usually tell if they are flakes. No loyalty among buyers!!!

Goodness.  Erase this person from your memory bank and look for better folks. 

Monica,

Things like this probably has happened to most agents that have been in the business a log time..I can tell it has happened to me back ni the 1990's when I was selling in NY..actually one time I had a buyer signed a contract and put it in their attorneys office and never heard from them again...the attorney claimed they backed out and thought they told me...I had a feeling because I didn't think they wanted the house during the inspection but I ignored it.

I found out later that they never bought the home and ended up buying a FSBO. I actually was in the community waiting for another client and saw them looking...that stinks and you did your due diligence..I guess it's time just to move on...they probably were embarrassed but it does stink that people do that.

I hear you...I think that has happened twice in umpteen years...I tell the buyer...before we start...not that it will turn them into a responsible adult...every listing we see can take up to 6 people's time....and they should choose carefully from all the information given them...I don't think it's about loyalty...it's being a responsible, considerable adult...and some folks just are not.

Consider yourself lucky - Being "stood up" in this business happens too often... Let it go and move on... Good luck!

Monika, I'd move on and let her go.  I wouldn't even bother first setting up an appointment at the office, because I don't think it makes a difference.  I've been stood up, sometimes at the property and sometimes at my office (never by the same person because I would not give a second chance!)  I agree with whomever said that you should email her to let her know why. 

I'm sorry that happened to you.  Living and working in a resort community, I find it not that unusual for that to happen.  What I normally do is to meet with them the day prior to going out and I do this at my office.  I feel this forces the issue of whether they are serious or not.

Deep cleansing breath...okay..release.  Again.....(Monika falls off chair) Whoops..too much cleansing breath.  Remember the nice older lady that made cookies, was so appreciative of what you did for her in her sale? And she wrote you a thank you note telling you so even though she sang your praises at the closing? Replace the no show with this near and dear.  It all averages out!

That's horrible! I hate this for you. I think I have been stood up once a few years ago and the client called while I was on floor and I offered to show her something.

Monika, I think at some time or the other, we've all had this happen. Weird, huh? Once I talked to guy on the phone several times, referrred him out, the agent set up the showings, they were to meet at the office first, and he didn't show. Weird....

If I were you I'd be thinking twice before getting into an escrow with somebody this disrespectful and flaky, assuming she's even serious. Nothing like the stress of a transaction to bring out the best in everybody.

Nice person. Maybe you should post her name and warn other agents about her, or take the high road and send her to a schizophrenic agent who also does not show up for appointments, OR send her a note saying that there is an unbelievable auction tomorrow morning at an address where there is no house ..just vacant land, or move on (which is probably the best and most productive idea but the least fun)!

Hi Monika,

I find it hard to believe that she is serious now....don't worry she will still be looking next year too! You are too good for the games. :)

There is no harm in even adverse circumstances to be a gracious professional.  You never know- who they know and what good can come from it down the road.

I think TOO much is made of the "internet" leads, and too much time is being spent to get them and convert them to clients. In reality, most of the ones I've dealt with are total jerks, with very little ethical background, and better off avoided. SOI and past clients are the best!

I always leave a message "thanking" jerks like these, for wasting my time, unless I "feel" something happened. I probably had 3 "standups" in 20 years, which isn't bad.

Monika,

You are too kind-hearted!  If this customer didn't even have the courtesy to cancel the appointment, what makes you think she'll be considerate this time around?  I say dump her!  Your time is too valuable to be wasted on someone like this...there are too many people out there who would appreciate the gem they have in you as their realtor!  Have a great weekend; it's beautiful out.

If a client does not write an offer (buyer) within a 7-21 day window they no longer should be treated like a client they are a prospect.