"Billy Bob...you don't look THAT stupid. (I paused.) Why don't you just keep your mouth shut and keep them guessing?"  LOL! You go girl! I can not believe that someone would be ignorant enough to say such a thing to your face. Or to anyone! Amen to this post sister. You done good little lady!

Fabulous post, Elizabeth. Good job handling Billy Bob the moron. It's a shame there are so many Billy Bob's still out there.

Debi

Hi Elizabeth!  Enjoyed your blog!  I believe in one thing...that people are people.  We all put our pants on the same way, and we all put food in our mouth...I think you get the point.

I tend to get along with everybody, regardless of race, education, or the amount of money they have.  A female friend of mine asked me one time..."How do you do it Greg?"  I wasn't sure what she meant, since she didn't add any more to her statement.  So I needed a bit of clarification.

She said that she had seen me spend time with people who lived in the poorest of housing projects and she had seen me chewing the fat with the wealthy, and wanted to know how I did it.  I told her it was really very simple...I looked at them as a "person" first.  I didn't see dollar signs, and I didn't see skin color.  I simply see another person, someone who has something in common with me, a person who eats, breathes, and sleeps. 

I may be white, but some of my best friends throughout my life have been people of other races.  I like that we all are different in culture, I'm a curious person and want to get to know more about those who may be different from me in some way.  Prejudice is rooted in ignorance...and I choose not to remain ignorant!

AS for Billy Bob...I feel for people like him.  They have no idea what they are missing in life.  There is such beauty in our differences, yet we are so much alike too.

Oh...loved what you told ol' Bill Bob!  You go girl!

Powerful post, Elizabeth.  I have seen pure hatred for people who are predudiced against others for one reason or another and I just don't understand it.  Sometimes it IS learned because I see it in their parents as well---people don't realize we are ALL just PEOPLE.

I do hope Billy Bob and others like him are out of ANY fields that involve PEOPLE.  GBU!!

Elizabeth~ well this has to be some sort of coincidence...I am starting a series on Indians (Native Americans) and wrote one the other night to start....then I find my blogging buddy Nannette is Native, and now you.....and seriously how many of your Posts do I come to....so something made me come here....I always believe in Destiny and Things happening for a reason.

The truths you mentioned here were/are alive and well in CA too.  I remember even in the Military the predjuice shown to others, and some States are worse than others...

Prejudice, unfortunately, is alive and well where I live also.  I hear it all the time when buyers try to find out the ethnic make-up of a neighborhood.  Some hem and haw, trying to pose the question in a way that is politically correct and doesn't make them look bigoted (good luck with that), while others don't seem to think there is anything wrong with the question.  When we can all not only be color blind but see the beauty in every person's uniqueness and the individual gifts we each bring to the table (which may include a perspective which has been greatly influenced because of one's color and/or ethnic background), as well as the beauty in the commonalities we all share as human beings, then we will be truly Enlightened.

Elizabeth - I still find it hard to believe that in the 21st century there is still such a strong presence of prejudice for a person's race, religion, sexual orientation, handicap, familial status or natural origin.   I was taught that we were all created equally as children of God and have never wavered from that belief my entire life.  I find it just as appalling when people are judged by how they look and dress.  We would all live in a much better world if we could learn to hate less and love more!

If one could peel the skin off every human in the world there would be many that would be surprised that we all look alike.  Muscle, tissue, veins, arteries, organs......all in the same place. 

I think God wrapped us all differently so it would be more fun to figure each other out!  Otherwise this would be a boring world.

'Billy Bob' would pull his hair out if he had to admit that under the wrapping he is the same as the Hispanic, Latino, African American, Native American, Muslim, Frenchman, Englishman, Middle Easterner, etc.  But, hey, that might be fun to watch.  Then we would know if his mind is really that narrow, or if his skull has dents in it.

Elizabeth - You are an amazing amazing woman...You a 'real'...you are 'smart', so savy and so caring...A heart of compassion......a beautiful voice......and have amazing stories to be told......I feel so honoured to be getting to know you....Now that post should be published......you should submit it to some magazines and papers......really..!

Elizabeth,

The preamble to our Code of Ethics codifies your business practice: 

The term REALTOR® has come to connote competency, fairness, and high integrity resulting from adherence to a lofty ideal of moral conduct in business relations.

I'd do a deal with you in a heart-beat.  Keep up the good work. 

Love your come-back to 'that guy.'  I'm from Hawaii and never really noticed color and didn't know what prejudice was... until I moved to Florida for a while way back in the 60's. I considered it ignorance.

Elizabeth:  After I read your amazing post... and started reading all of the following comments... I was trying to come up with a word to describe my reaction to what you had to say.  Carole above came up with the best word for me to use... "powerful."

Yikes... what a story.  No wonder Carol Smith thinks you "hung the moon."  :)  I have read many of your posts in the past... but for some reason this one seemed to bring something home to me about you.  Thanks so much for sharing... you are just too cool for words.  I just know that you and Carol will do well together.  Take care... :)

By the way... I just loved the way you handled good ol' boy Billy Bob.  I grew up in Cleveland... and had some similar issues being "white" and having chosen to have some "black" friends.  Many folks were just fine... but many of them were such jerks.

PS... I just love your new picture.  I just noticed it... how long since you changed it ?  It looks great... not that the other one didn't... LOL.

Elizabeth,

When I teach New Agent Orientation and we get to Fair Housing I let them know that there is no room in this profession for prejudice and if they have any leanings that way then I show them to the door.  Being raised in Texas and then moving to Georgia in 1960 I had a stomach full of that kind of stuff and don't have time for it at all.  GBU and thank you for this post ma'am.

One can only shake their head at such ignorance and try to educate the ignorant. (You did a great job in doing that!)  Goodness Elizabeth, hard to believe that this type of thing still goes on isn't it?

Great post. It is unfortunate that there are people who are prejudiced .

Elizabeth,

Unfortunately as a black male, I still face predjudice in 2008.  Things have gotten better and this country has come a long way.  I have found on my journey through life some real idiots of all colors, races and creeds. I have also found some great people of all colors races and creeds.   I know the heritage of the south, however, I have met some great people in the south.  I think most people will  treat you the way you treat them. 

The sad thing is that as a minority, I have to work much harder to prove myself.  My grandmother warned me early saying "you will have to work twice as hard to get half as much".  However, I think the struggle has been good for me.  I know that I am the greatest realtor in Burlington Township, New Jersey.   I did not get that confidence because I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I had to learn what it was like to do without.  I think because of that, i am very compassionate  This I believe helps my clients as well as those on the other side of the closing table.  

Thanks for all of the good work you do in your neck of the woods. I wil do the same in mine.  Be proud of your heritage.  Everyone should be

Have a great day

Leander 

Loved your reply to Mr Agent Billy Bob.  Sounds like someone to continue to stay far away from...his time will come and he will eventually shoot himself in his foot.  

Elizabeth the Billy Bobs of this world are just what you called him Stupid.  Good for you!

I have never felt more angry than when someone judges someone else based on anything other than that individuals character.  I have fought with my in laws and other family members who just don't get it but I made them keep their views away from my children as they were growing up.  These people don't seem to be able to change the internal messages they were taught as children but I surely could and do keep it from infecting my children. 

Our world is ever shrinking and we need to base our judgment on a person simply on their character and the way they live their lives.  GBU.

I was glad to read this post, because I think the problem of racism extends is still a mmajor problem. Being Jewish, I am constantly amazed by the number of people who run companies and are very visible in the business world who change their name and give the appearance of not being Jewish. Whether they are scared or ashamed, it is a shame that they do this. In our presidential race, the one thing that concerns me is that there is a large number of people who are not open to a black president. There still is a frightening high number of "uneducated" people throughout the US who are like Billy Bob. 

Elizabeth, stupid is as stupid does. What a great come back to Billie Bob. Wow, it is amazing to me how some folks can be so blatent. This is the 21st century and it is such a shame. Prejudice in many cases is buried deep, but for Realtors it is time to let it go and grow up.

Elizabeth I can not even imagine how difficult growing up in that environment must have been. People that are predjudice have limited minds. The world has gotten a little better but this kind of stuff continues to happen everyday and it is a shame.

I guarantee you, that Mr. "Billy Bob" didn't get it.  While your reply to him was excellent, I'm sure he still thought that you were the one who was nuts.  Those who are prejudiced, rarely see themselves in the description of those who are prejudiced.  I have a colleague in our office who is seriously prejudiced, and often beings his statements with "Now, I'm not prejudiced, but..." and then goes on to make a prejudiced statement.  Nobody would be more surprised to know that people consider him prejudiced, than he.

Elizabeth - You have highlighted so well here not only our Code of Ethics but our Fair Housing Act as basic to what our nation is supposed to represent. Well spoken. Keep on being that light on the hill.

I would be surprised if Billy Bob is still in the business. I commend you for following your passion. Great Post!

Love it Liz....I've seen this all too often.  I have had a couple of wonderful hispanic women working for me.  I'd invariably get complaints from repeat customers because of their English.  Their english was perfect, there accent wasn't.  It wasn't a hard accent.  It was just not white enough for them.  Invariably, work is work.  I want someone who will work for me....I'm not interested in the packaging.  I want what's inside.

Liz- what a powerful and moving post. The Billy Bob's of the world still amaze me as to their downright stupidness. Billy Bob needs to have his license revoked and for good!  

Great job Elizabeth!  Congrats on that little gold star, too!  Now, down to the nitty-gritty--you've outdone yourself here and here's my take on this issue--First of all, I thought you were hispanic because of the 'bilingual' title on your site!  That said, you've become one of my absolute favorites here because you think like me--your candor is refreshing as are your heartfelt articles.  It doesn't matter WHAT nationality or race you are, you're YOU and we all adore you!  As a former operating room and oncology nurse, I KNOW that everyone looks the EXACT same on the inside! 

Why does skin color matter?  Who knows but, I will say this--'Billy Bob' is the FIRST customer that I would pass on to someone else!

Thanks for the reminder to all Elizabeth!

Beautifully written....I live in such a diverse cultural area with MANY different ethnic groups.....I have lived all over the world. That kind of thinking (Billy Bob) is really beyond my comprehension.

Hi Elizabeth, my sister. Wow, God was preparing your heart all along to be a light to ALL people for Him. Oh, BTW we are blood kin - thank God !! Blessings,

What a great post with a powerful message. I wrote an essay in college about the hidden minorities, those of us who are biracial but, what's that old term, "pass as white". Thank you for holding your heritage and caring so much for others.

Elizabeth, powerful and inspired ..as I knew it would be. I loved all the comments and was touched by them all.  Leander" comment really touched my heart 

"I have to work much harder to prove myself"   That shouldn't be ....He turned that into a positive in his life. As a result a blessing to many I am sure.  Leander, a lot of us are faced with that " I have to work harder to prove myself " but I wonder how many have the courage, strength and respect for themselves to overcome what the crazy world throws at them..  My little grandson is  in a multi-cultural school and how that has shaped him and made him aware of the differences among people,  add enforce the respect and appreciation for everyone. He is growing up to be a fine little guy that loves to learn about others ..that has enriched hi beyond his young years.  We have to learn to appreciate each other. I need to tell him about your Native American Heritage, he will love it ( the truly only real Americans) Celebrate your Heritage  The "Billy Bobs" of the world exist in ignorance and closed mindedness.

Elizabeth   said it best ........love it!...Love Elizabeth..what a blessing we have in her............

As humans...we have a moral responsibility to be colorblind. The ‘Golden Rule' challenges us to ‘Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.' Let's take that one step further...‘Whatever is hurtful to you, do not do to any other person.'

Prejudice is a disease...but unlike cancer or AIDS, we already have the CURE. IF the cause of this disease is HATE...then the cure for this disease must certainly be LOVE. LET'S LOVE ONE Another

sorry Elizabeth went to edit the first post and ccould not delete it so it got entered twice the firat one should be deleted but it won't let me do it. Please delete spelling is terrible.  thanks

Elizabeth,  What a wonderful post !  You write very well and I suspect it comes across in your dealings witjh your customers.  Your premise is so right on: it is not based in logic or reason...it is rooted in hatred.  I am amazed at how some of the better known agents here practise such hatred toward one of our presidential cnadidates !

Wow!  That was a mouthful.  I, being raised in the South, heard all the same jokes and lived around the same 'kind' growing up.  However, my parents thought it was very important to explore all cultures and loved all people.  This proves hate starts and stops at home.  It is a descision we make ourselves but it a real advantage to have parents that teach us 'the right way' of thinking.

Thank you for your post.  One of my all time favorite movies is Imitation of Life.  If you haven't seen it I know you will enough it.

Elizabeth, once again a steriling post with a great message. I think most of us have run up against this in one way or another in our lives. It is truly sad. I think it is getting even worse and I am not so sure we are making as much progress as we think we are.

BeBlessed

John

Elizabeth, I am so sorry that you had to experience this, but oh my word, what an awesome post!

I agree, saying you were raised that way is NO excuse.  I was raised by two racists. My dad would rail against ANYONE who wasn't white, and even among the whites, he made fun of Polish people, Irish people, etc.  My mom was a little more gracious and might stick her neck out and say "Well, she is nice, for a colored woman."

She'd say "colored" with a bit of a grimace and a drop in her volume to imply that she was embarrased to even utter the word.

I hate that stuff.  I hate it, I hate it.  I like everyone, unless they're jerks...and jerkiness is not determined by skin color, it's determined by the heart.

I love what you said to ole Billy Bob. Too bad he was too "ignernt" to be insulted by it.

Well done Elizabeth and old bill bob probably STILL DIDN't Get it. Keep on truckin'.

Hello Elizabeth,
The world needs more "Elizabeths" that are willing to stand up to the "Billy Bob's" and put them in their place!  I love your passion and heart.

Wow! What a post.  Unfortunately, I have the same problem of racism in my city.  It is going to take brave, determined Realtors to change the small minds of the ignorant.  We have the ability to do that, one mind at a time.  Never change your ways!

Unfortunately it doesn't always come from the "other side". I have worked with a number of hispanic clients who started out with a hispanic agent and /or lender only to find that they were totally taken advantage of. I had one who was referred to me by a mortgage company (because I had previously helped someone that they were funding that had been mistreated) because one of their own loan officers had literally stolen money from them! I was told by them that this is rampant in their community. I was horrified!

It is just as disgusting (more so in my opinion) when people pick and choose who to take advantage of based on race! You can't even write that off as ignorance! It's like people who are multiracial who "choose" what race "they are" based on what will benefit them!

Ignorance is one thing. We simply don't know what we don't know! Hate and greed are different.

All we can do is "lead by example" and show that we aren't "all the same" no matter what race we are! (and take comfort in the notion that what goes around comes around!)

Elizabeth, I remember living through those race riots of the 1970's in high school (Wichita Kansas).  It was an interesting time wasn't it.  The good news is that our children are now color blind; I love that. 

Beth - Wow...that was really intense.  I completely agree with Liz...it should be printed somewhere in a magazine or racism learning manual or something.  Growing up I had a lot of that to...being "white" and choosing primarily "black" friends.  I went to one school where there were only 3-4 black kids in the whole school and they were my ONLY friends.  I saw the hatred every where too but I some how never let it be who I was.  You are an amazing woman and I love what you told Billy Bob.  You go girl!  GBU!

Elizabeth, Another gem from your pen. After reading your posts I am often left so in awe, i am speechles. God has ceertainly place some real "Characters" in your path!  Hopefully some of them will catch your light & love by watching you shine. Even Billy Bob has a chance. So I will pray for he has metanoia of the heart.

GBU,

Ginger

Well the long way to say you are living your passion and your dream.  And what lucky clients you have to have someone so committed to their real estate journey.  Good for you. 

My goodness you are so admired in the Heavenlies. I believe that hell trembles at the sound of your feet hitting the floor each morning. And although it's hard to believe, God loves Billy Bob as much as you or me???? What a big and gracious God we serve! Keep the wonderful testimonies coming.

-Just Bob

Elizabeth - Love the catchy title.  Its amazing how we find prejudice everywhere.  In different parts of the country and the world people are prejudiced against different groups.  People seem to be uncomfortable around others who are different in some way whether it is color of their skin, religion, sexual presuasion, beliefs, how you dress...the list is endless.  I don't know why we can't be tolerant of other point's of view and learn from people who are different from us.  Somehow everything in life always seems to come down to "do unto others".
BTW I have ultimate respect for the career path that you have chosen.  It must be very satisfying.

Elizabeth~ I find it amazing that people are prejudice in this day and age.  I have had a few best friends that happened to be Black, or Hispanic, Caucasian,.....  I never saw color, I just saw the qualities in them that I look for in my friends, period!  Who cares about color?  It blows my mind that people can be so shallow!

Good Morning Elizabeth.  My comment was getting way too long - so I started over.  Let me just say that there is way too much prejudice in the world.   I am a true believer that there is ONE RACE... the Human Race :)

Elizabeth~  thank you for a wonderful post!  It's amazing the lengths that we human beings will go through to seperate ourselves from each other, itsn't it?  Pretty foolish too...because our only power is in unity...the only way we can change our world for the better.

www.TheSerenaGroup.com

Hi Elizabeth – great post.  As everyone has stated before me you do have a way with words (that’s why I voted you to write the AR preamble) but back to the point here.  I experienced firsthand prejudice as a child when my adopted sister arrived from Greece.  The neighborhood kids were hard on her because she was different.  Then while living in Quebec – not because of color or creed – no it was because of language!  Now how stupid and small minded can that be???  I wasn’t considered a francophone and because of such was  run out of town by a few small people.  Well actually we decided to leave -  but we had our share of run ins with the language police. 

'Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.'

Raleigh Realtor – Pamela St. Peter

Onward and upward.

HELLO EVERYONE:

I will do my very best to come back and respond to each of your comments individually. I have been particularly slammed these past few days, but I so very much appreciate your thoughtful comments. They are proof that this issue of racism is something that many of us feel strongly about and will stand up against, at all costs. THANK YOU for taking a stand here in this post.

The sad thing that 'Billy Bob' is still licensed in North Carolina. In fact, he even had the nerve to contact me about a year ago...asking if I wanted to have lunch with him to catch up. I HOPE he reads this post. In fact, I think I'll send it to him by email...so that he can read your comments.

Will it get through to him or change him? Probably not. Will it prevent him from taking out his prejudice and hatred on innocent people? I don't think so. Will it make me feel better? YEAH...it will make me feel better to once again send this message to him loud and clear.

GBU GUYS!!!

Elizabeth- I knew from the moment I first connected with you hear on AR that we were sisters from different mothers... after today's post I understand completely why I felt that way....

Irony--- I started my career in real estate as the secretary in a small firm..

it's my grandfather that was native American... not my father... although my father had to take plenty of crap for it...

And while I have never had Billy Bob for a co-worker or employee... I'm sure I've met him and yup... if he'd just keep his mouth shut no one would know how stupid he is.

This is a very moving post and hoping that you won't mind if I share it with my staff on Thursday's sales meeting.  It's important to point out from time to time that we should be doing More to help people who might otherwise get the fair and just treatment they deserve.

Thanks for sharing the post most people do not discussed the Billy Bobs they encounter and usually stay silent acting as if everything is ok and its not.  More people need to be as brave as you.  Thanks again.

elizabeth, i am very sorry someone made you feel so bad that you are still carrying the hurt around with you.  your're a sweetie.

I do agree and understand your point, but you are not going to ever change the world. You have to learn to reply with humor or you will go through life very miserable.  i.e. Chill out a bit.  People are getting way too sensative in today's world and we all need to have some humor to put people in their place.  The comments are merely because of insecurity.  You will not change that. If you pull back you too will show insecurity.  Have some humor in how you follow back with someone.  You can come up with something that everyone else may laugh a bit, but you will be able to put the other person in their place....when they think about it for awhile.  i.e. Don't get mad, get even with a bit of fun....... I have a zillion reasons to be insecure, but I won't let the world get to me.

I think you handled the situation well!

TAMMY:  I am not surprised by any of the 'common denominators' we share. I felt a connection with you right away. You KNOW what I'm talking about, huh? BTW...you KNOW that you are ALWAYS welcome to use anything of mine you want. I like sharing. :-) GBU!

DEANDREA:  Thank you! I'm not sure I'm brave...just willing to take a stand for what is right. GBU!

CHERYL:  Thank you, but I don't think it still hurts. I just know that this kind of thing happens ALL THE TIME. It makes me sick. I am determined to speak out against it...to be a voice for the cause. GBU!

TIM:  Well...I think I CAN change the world...at least my immediate world. AND even if I can't...I'm gonna still try. Knowledge is power...and truth is light. The more I speak the truth...the harder it will be for the hatred to hide in the dark. BTW...I think my comeback was pretty funny. I laugh every time I think about it. THANKS and GBU!!