Over the years I have had various conversations with folks about relationships, and about why some fail or why others are unhappy in the ones they are in. I have come to the conclusion it is because we all have certain expectations from the other person and about the relationship.(myself included). Having expectations that are not being met leads to resentment, anger and feelings of discontent. However it would be nice if we could discover a way to enter a relationship and give of ourselves to the other without expecting anything in return. Easy to say, but how do you do it, when we all have some basic need or wants, such as affection, respect, acceptance, intimacy, (not sexual) etc. If some of these are absent we become, lonely and feel disconnected.
So looking back at my own failed relationships, and taking a deep look within myself I came about what I thought would be the ideal relationship. Is it possible?? some may say no, others would say yes it is attainable but rare. Personally what I am about to describe in my opinion can be obtainable, provided that both partners are sensitive to the needs of one another. Some call it a spiritual connection, when they can look past the physical person and sense, know completely and love the presence of the other, that inner person.
What Men and Women Want...
If a man honors a woman with love, compassion and devotion greater than himself....and if a woman honors a man with love, compassion and devotion greater than herself.....than neither shall ever need nor want.....for they are in themselves....complete!
Paul LeMay
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Paul, these are amazingly wise words. If human nature just worked that way! So, when I want to scream "what about me?" in my relationship it would show us to both be wrong. Him for not putting me first and me for not putting him first. The one thing I have learned in this world about relationships is that they are a whole heck of a lot of work.
I do love your idealism. If you find it...call me.
Later in the rain~Deb