Sylvester Stallone co-writes, directs, stars and inspires sextagenerians everywhere in a movie so violent and bloody, that it starts off disturbing, but ends up ridiculous. By ridiculous I mean that I'm having a hard time admitting that I got off on the anatomical yard sale left behind by Stallone and his fifty-caliber death spray. This Rambo makes all others look like Pee Wee adventures. It's
Apocalypto with land mines. And Sylvester Stallone makes Barry Bonds look like Pee Wee baseball. If he peed in a cup blow out the bottom.
The last Rambo I remember he was fighting Soviets with bin Laden's boys of the Mujahadeen. This time he teams up with the rebel armies battling brutal oppression in Burma (followed by the perfunctory NPR phrase, "now known as Myanmar"). There's also a pretty Christian girl from Colorado who gets his attention. To save her a lot of people will die.
Beware: Up close slaughter of women, children and decency. There's even some kind of awful torture involving farm animals. Since the last Rambo, he's had time to peruse nasty videos on the Internet. This gets more gruesome than you can imagine.
Who Will Like This: Anyone wanting a 90-minute tutorial of exactly what a large bullet does to the human body. And BALCO.
Secret to Better Enjoyment: The missionaries portrayed as good people overall, but with a slight whiff of annoying moral superiority.
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Jared Ewy
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Seems to me Mr. Stalone has been going through a very severe midlife crisis a few years after the norm - time to give up on really truly attrocious 80's characters turning 100 (I mean 60). I have no desire to see yet more bloodshed and violence, there is more than enough in the news today.